Definitive answers in a subjective world?
Over the past couple weeks, I've been feeling like my head is going to explode. It is so full of thoughts that need to be released, but every time I try to formulate these thoughts I just can't seem to make words work for me. It's like that horrible feeling of something being at the tip of your tongue but you just can't get it out. I guess the easiest way to go about it is to just start at the tip and go back to the root of it all: change.
Change is inevitable and we all know that, I won't pretend that this is shocking news to me. What astounds me though, is how rapidly change has been washing over me lately. When I say change, I think I mean more of an internal change. You know like one day you adamantly believe something, and then the next day you change your mind completely. And yes, I do mean the next day. That's the thing, at first I could notice my thoughts and opinions change over years; now, I notice these changes within months and weeks.
I have expressed this to several people lately because I feel like there must be something wrong with me. How could I be almost 23 years old, yet so confused about so much? I'm not trying to solve any grand, life changing riddle....just who am I? People have been telling me that this is normal for people my age, but that doesn't comfort me nor help me. This is as far as I can get before my mind starts to go numb. I just think and think until I give up and decide to block the thoughts out for as long as possible.
The only positive side I see to all of this is that I am able to see many different perspectives. This makes understanding people easier. If you subject yourself to strictly ONE way of thinking and convince yourself that all other ways are wrong, then the only person you're hurting is yourself. Keeping an open mind is always a good rule of thumb. For now I am embracing all change, and trying to loosen my overly stubborn mentality. It makes absolutely no sense to try to stunt change when you already know it's inevitable. So here's to welcoming change and hoping for the best.